I am watching the Marigold Hotel. The last movie Iz and I went to see. We saw it at the Sawtell Movie Theatre before they closed it and now it has been saved and is being revamped. Iz and I can’t be revamped. He is gone now and I am shatteringly sad. I am lonely and bored by myself in Urunga. I have some money left and I think I might need to make a big decision of some kind.
Too much alone. Too little to do. Too familiar.
Only a few weeks before he died, I saw a spirit being scuttle across the road near Mum and Dad’s old Home. It was kind of lizard/mammal and I reached across and screamed at him to stop driving but even as I did so I knew it wasn’t there in this reality. I told people about it because it was so clear. I don’t know what it was – but I reckon it took him with it and now I am tired enough to sit here forever.
Well, I did it. Did the Meeting. Still didn’t enjoy it but so what. So what ! Then I went downtown and had lunch with the Women and got my antibiotics and cocoanut oil and shampoos and stuff. And now I am home. ANOTHER DAY DONE. I found a flat in Snug Cove. Its beautiful and affordable. I am waiting. Waiting for a leading. A clear Leading on my next move. Its rained all day today and some thunder roared around.
To get through this week, I shall choose the thing each day which warms my heart when I think of it and I shall make it the Priority. Lets see what changes that makes.
I have one thing tomorrow which I don’t want to do. Maybe more than one. Meeting DOCs with Kirs. And booking in for rego. Then I shall give myself either the AA meeting or stay home.
But Wednesday – I have BOOK WEEK PARADE. At Bellingen School. That’s the thing I DO want to do. Then I can do Acupuncture and maybe Lymphatic Massage. Then maybe I shall go to the Doctor and maybe not. I need to cancel the eye surgery. That does not warm my heart.
I haven’t lined up the Heart Warmer for Thursday but for Friday, its Saf’s School Assembly where she does the script for the play and gets her awards. And Friday evening , Eden comes on Facetime. And maybe we can talk flats in Snug Cove and maybe we can talk about some solutions to a few things.
That’s a few Heart Warmers.
WHAT A DIFFERENCE THAT MADE IN OUR LIVES !