Tag Archives: ACAT


This slideshow requires JavaScript.


Jesus H Christ – here it comes again. Sorrowing and a sense of horror. And the struggle to desire to keep living. O lord. Oh. I am distraught. Migod. Its all such shit. It was this emotion that led me to heroin addiction. Finding life simply unbearable. And here I am again. 40 years later. Feeling the same way. Tis is the emotion that led me to dropping out and eating opium.

I am hot and bitten and heartbroken and weary in the core of my being.

And now , fatigue and heat take over and I look at bed. A cold shower and then bed and hope noone nicks my kayak in the night.

Whoa that one passed over more savagely but much more quickly. And I have landed here at midnight – and its OK. There is a new kayak out the back and I went for dinner with S.C and her family. And Things are OK. Dear Lord stop me going near officialdom. I just have a serious allergic reaction to al the agencies even when the people are nice.

Maybe tomorrow, I will be OK again. Maybe tomorrow, I will go on. Maybe tomorrow something will matter to me again.

izzy nambucca

Individuality ignored   from ASTRODIENST http://www.astro.com/horoscope ***

Valid during many months: During this time you will have to cope with powerful outside forces that seem to take no regard of your individual ego. Your individuality will not be challenged so much as ignored, unless you stand in the way of these forces, in which case you may have some extremely discouraging experiences.Elements of your life that you have always counted on may begin to pass away in ways that are extremely difficult to understand. There will be no dramatic signs of social struggle and change, but the old order is passing away. What may be most difficult to accept is that there seems to be nothing that you can fight directly. It is as if many circumstances, relationships, possessions and various other conditions of your life have lost their right to be and are withering away. You can waste your time regretting this situation, thereby putting yourself into the same position, or you can come to terms with the new world and become part of it. This is one of the decisions you will have to make, although probably your internal conditioning will determine your decision in advance.Another side of this influence is that hidden aspects of your unconscious mind may flare up and begin to influence your life now. Elements of your personality that you prefer to keep hidden from others may become so evident that you can no longer avoid them.The only solution, therefore, is to deal with them. They are probably not as bad as you think anyway. It is not their intrinsic nature but repression that makes them seem bad. Now you must throw away the past conditioning that makes you reject these perfectly valid aspects of yourself.

Transit selected for today (by user):
Pluto square Neptune, ,
activity period beginning of February 2015 until mid-December 2016

Toughening up ***
Valid during many months: At this time you will make gradual but very profound changes in your life and create structures that will last a long time. You work at this task with great patience and attention to detail, because you are not working for today only. You are working for tomorrow as well.This influence confers great endurance, which enables you to work slowly over a long period of time to eliminate those elements of your life that have become unnecessary and limiting, replacing them with structures that are more relevant to your present activities.This is a period of slow but profound change within yourself also. Certain aspects of your character are changing and taking on a form that will last for many years. This change may be reflected in certain external changes in your public appearance or any other important activity in your life.You are likely to be very careful about everything that you do under this influence. Because you try not to waste anything, the people around you may think you are excessively conservative. But really you are just acting with great discipline.Whether or not it is necessary, you are able now to get along with very little in the way of material goods. And you have a phenomenal ability to contend with adversity if you have to. This influence has the effect of toughening you up considerably.A related effect is that persons in authority may give you considerable power to reorganize a structure at some level. They are acknowledging your disciplined, orderly approach to every task, which is characteristic of this influence.
Transit selected for today (by user):
Pluto trine Saturn, ,
activity period end of January 2015 until beginning of December 2016
Higher dimensions ***
Valid during many months: How you will react to this influence will depend upon how well you have learned certain of life’s lessons. If you are extremely materialistic and so caught up in the mundane concerns of daily life that you cannot see or conceive of anything higher – whether it be a religion, a system of ideals or whatever – you will experience this time as extremely confusing. Events will occur that simply do not fit into your scheme, and you will become confused and perhaps act in ways that you consider very unwise. You may suddenly start chasing after wild and impractical dreams, become involved with persons who are very out of touch with reality and generally get your goals thoroughly scrambled.All of this arises because this influence exposes you to higher dimensions of existence, to a world that doesn’t work like the one you have been taught to see. Nevertheless this higher world is real and important, in that it gives life meaning even though seemingly far removed from it. If you have always frowned on idealistic notions of higher metaphysical dimensions, this influence will confuse and upset you, because it reveals these dimensions to you. But if you have learned that the universe does not stop with what you can see and feel with your senses, this influence will allow you to experience profound revelations and understanding. Your degree of enlightenment or confusion depends entirely upon how well prepared you are.
Transit selected for today (by user):
Uranus opposition Neptune, ,
activity period beginning of May 2014 until 4 April 2015