Today, jt CAME AND BROUGHT A BALE OF HAY and did my garden. Her and my girls. A warm Autumn day in the sun. I am no gardener. I understand their conversations as little as I understand discussions about cooking. Well, I understand the words but not the allure. I do, however, like gardens.
Today, my sister would have been 63 but she died in 2011. Died with me sitting beside her. Just the one tear rolled down her cheek and then she stopped. Just stopped. I know what death looks like now. Once, I didn’t but now I do. They simply stop and vacate the premises.
And leave the rest of us to garden.
Today, I am well pleased that I don’t take drugs or drink alcohol or do anything which would make less of this Mourning. I haven’t grabbed a new Man or run off to a new place. Its damned near killed me – but tonight I am glad. I feel like A whole person. I feel honourable.