COMING BACK TO ME

SOGGY SUNDAY

Tonight , I can almost see her – just ahead of me – waiting . The Lynne who has gone a little ahead and stands – waiting – holding out a new mantle for me to wear into the next year.

Changed by  grace, you shed one garment of the spirit for a better one. In time, you throw that one aside for a yet finer one. And so from character to character, you are gradually transformed.

It was a very soggy day and I opted for another at home day. This is my quiet withdrawal time – something which works for me with my eremitic leanings. Home is where I begin to take off the sackcloth and ashes and prepare for the walking side by side with the Sorrowing. I stand a little straighter. My hair is a little longer. The memories are a little clearer and I begin to think.

And I see Her. Waiting.

So – what happened today ?

RQ called and we talked for a long time. Eden Facetimed and Buster borrowed my yellow bin to put out some throw aways from his place. Next door knocked to see whether he could take some chillies from the abundant chilli bush in my back garden and told me of his time in Malaysia. We talked of bamboo. RQ had me looking for properties up here and KLB offered me some sushi for tomorrow. I took one drive to the Supermarket and bought halva and raspberry cordial. And Mini Me is 11 years old. All day it drizzled. I have the gas heater on and the electric blanket. Tonight is OK. I have 2 books recommended to me by Mad O’Brian and the Bell family had a reunion in Birchgrove and sent me fotos. Staying home is good for the Soul sometimes. Specially whilst I am spiritually naked.

BORED WITHOUT YOU

I have hesitated to say that I am very bored without Iz in my life – thought it sounded a little selfish and shallow – but tonight I realised its a fine eulogy.

Izzy – I am rather bored without you.

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MAYBE I can sleep now. I am lonely and bored. I can surely go on and live but what fun  he was and when there was a cause or when I had an IDEA we were out there doing it. Down In Eden they are trying to save a grand old Hotel. The HOTEL AUSTRALASIA. They are playing music and causing a fuss to get it saved. He would have been there. For sure. And he chose me and he loved me . Unwaveringly – no matter what I was like. No matter what I did. A constant Lover. Generous to my family and to the new people in my Fellowships. I liked Izzy and I liked our life and I am just a trifle bored without his companionship and faithfulness and enormously adventurous Spirit.

Fancy being able to look at 8 years of your life and pretty much find only laughter, adventure and love and joy. And the lingering memory of that beautiful voice.

I kind of think – now – after pancakes and maple syrup at midnight – that wherever he is , he would be singing this old favourite of his by Shel.

(Shel Silverstein)

I can’t touch the clouds for you, I’ll never reach the sun for you
I’ve never done the things that you need done for you
I’ve stretched as high as I can reach, I guess I’m not the one for you
‘Cause I can’t touch the clouds or reach the sun for you
No I can’t reach the clouds or touch the sun

I can’t turn back time for you, and make you sweet sixteen again
I can’t turn your barren fields to green again
And I won’t sit around and talk of how things might have been again
No I can’t turn back time and make you young again
I can’t turn back time and make you young

I hope you find somebody who can do the things I didn’t do
And find the road I didn’t find, and build a brighter world for you
I hope you find somebody old enough to reach and take a hold
And guide your ever changing mind, and free your ever risin’ soul
But I can’t, No I can’t

I can’t look inside your mind, and see the things you’re hopin’ for
And I can’t help you chase the dream you’re gropin’ for
You say your arms are open wide, but Lord knows who they’re open for
No I can’t know your mind or chase your dreams with you
No I can’t chase your dreams or know your mind

So say goodbye and don’t look back, I’ve had some happy days with you
Sorry I can’t be the one who stays with you
And when they ask about me, you can say I was the one with you
Who never touched the clouds or reached the sun with you
No I can’t reach the clouds or touch the sun

I guess it’s done, I can’t touch the sun for you, ooh, ooh, ooh
I can’t touch the sun, I can’t no I can’t, ooh, no, ooh, no
I can’t touch the sun, no lord, no, hmm, hmm….

Its OKAY, Iz. I know you would if you only could. As I would for you.

PITY RECOVERY DESTROYS THE CREATIVE AND COOL IN US ! NOT.

DIAMONDS AND RUST

SISTERS

IN THE CHILLY HOURS

JE NE REGRETTE RIEN

MONDAY IN MID WINTER

THE END OF THE DAY

Well ain’t that just shit.

GOODNIGHT JUNE MOON

IZZY – THE LAST MONTH – 21 MAY 2014 – 21 JUNE 2014.

THE DESCENT INTO WINTERTIME.

22 MAY 2014 MAGNESIUM OIL FOR THE FEET

23 MAY 2014 PERFORMING AT ANCHORS WHARF CAFE URUNGA. 24 MAY 2014 AT THE BELLINGEN SHOW WITH PHIL WOOD IN THE R.M. WILLIAMS VAN

25 MAY 2014  – AT RALEIGH RUMBLING

26 MAY 2014 RALEIGH WITH THE THREE HOUND DOGS AND A BREKKIE BOOK

27 MAY COFFS HARBOUR DOWN AT PARK BEACH

28 MAY 2014 THE GARDEN AT RALEIGH

29 MAY 2014 RALEIGH

30 may 2014 EUNGAI POST OFFICE AND STORE

31 MAY 2014 IZZY IN SOUTH WEST ROCKS WHERE HE STOLE A ROCK

1 JUNE 2014 IZZY FOREAL WITH GEORGE FINNEY AND SANDRA CLARK AT RALEIGH WINERY.

2 JUNE 2014 IZZY WITH SANDRA CLARK AT THE OCEANVIEW HOTEL IN URUNGA.

3 JUNE 2014 DOWN AT COFFS JETTY. WE HAD JUST BOUGHT A PAIR OF YACHTING SHOES.

IZZY 4 JUNE 2014 AT 3D HEADLAND ON A VERY SPECIAL DAY. PLAYING THE MERMAID AND THE SCURVEY PIRATE WITH HIS SAFFRON DOWN AT 3RD HEADLAND.

5 JUNE 2014 IZZY FOREAL AND SANDRA CLARK REHEARSING AT RALEIGH

6 JUNE 2014 IZZY IN HIS MUSIC ROOM . HE LOVED THAT ROOM.  BETTER MEMORIES ARE THAT HE LOVED HIS ROOM.

7 JUNE 2014 IZ SPENDS THE DAY LETTERBOXING RALEIGH FOR HIS GIG AT THE WINERY THE NEXT DAY. THEN COMES HOME THROUGH THE HAY AND GRASSES IN THE KOMBI.

8 JUNE 2014  RALEIGH WINERY

9 JUNE 2014 AND IZZY GOES HUNTING IN SCRAPYARDS FOR THINGS TO MAKE HIS GARDENS.

AT HOME IN  THE KITCHEN AT RALEIGH ON 10 JUNE 2014. HE LOVED HAVING A KITCHEN TO HIMSELF.

11 JUNE 2014 IZZY PLAYING WITH HIS SAFFRON AT HOME IN RALEIGH

12 JUNE 2014 IZZY AND THE PIANO AT THE TIP. HE REALLY WANTED TO BRING THIS ONE HOME.

13 JUNE 2014 IN THE FIG TREES IN FERNMOUNT

14 JUNE 2014 AT HOME FEEDING CATS AND BUILDING SHEDS

DRIVING M’LADY. 15 JUNE 2014.

16 JUNE 2006 IZZY OUT IN HIS BELOVED YARD. HE SURE DID LIKE GROWING THINGS.

IZZY’S LAST MONTH 17 JUNE 2014 AT THE POMEGRANATE CAFE IN URUNGA. EATING OUT – ONE OF IZZY’S FAVOURITE THINGS.

AT NORTH BEACH WITH SAFFRON ON 18 JUNE 2014

19 JUNE 2014 A DAY AT HOME WITH DOGS AND CATS AND LAWNS AND GARDENS AND A SHED TO BE BUILT

20 JUNE THE LAST DAY. SIGH. SIGH.